Two years ago to this day, I did realise a few things about myself. However, in this last year I have realised a few more things about myself.
Yesterday, I did something that seemed quite relevant at the time, during which is had no idea of the significance of the date. I finally managed to say goodbye. I said goodbye to all the lasting memories and objects that reminded me of him. Now I know that my heart was telling me that it was finally time to say goodbye. Despite the fact that I said I didn't care, up until very recently, I still held feelings for him, I don't know why, I should've wanted to kill him, but I did. My first love, you know? Throwing away the last remnants of the meal that was our relationship has cured me of everything.
I can't believe it's been two years already.
In some respects, I feel like the last two years has not gone quickly enough. I feel like I spent ages mourning over the death of his love, and far too much time trying to get over him.
In other respects I feel like the past two years have flown by too quick for me to take it all in.
Look at us all. Some of us are in University, some of us are going next year, and I'm a Drag Artiste with rising populairty. We've all changed so much and despite the fact that a lot has been said and there have been a lot of arguments over the past two years, you know, I love you all and I can't imagine my life without the support and love of the people I've grown up with.
Louise, I'm sorry for all the awful things that have happened over the past two years but let's face it, you couldn't have an argument if you didn't care about the person. What I'm trying to say is that I care about you a lot, and you were there for me for like three years, non-stop. Let's remember the good times.
Marie, to be honest, I don't think we've ever had a disagreement as such, (unless I'm forgetting anything). I've resented you, but for so many reasons and they're not neccessarily bad either. You're intelligent, beautiful, witty, with a great sense of humour, and you know where you're life is going. You're really great Marie.
Natalie, now I know we've had our little tiffs, but let's put that down to sexual tension
George, I'm so thrilled that you got in to Oxford! WOOP! You're hilarious, who could ever forget you, you big dirty lesbian? You're brilliant. Intelligence, height, and you're a mint party-animal. No party would be complete without you, and no university would be either for that matter.
Steph, I'll never forget the day we met, and you jumped a mile on the bus when we went past trees. You're funny, so creative and so very different. I loved PSME with you and *coughs* MRS HAY, and you will always be a minute away from me
Lorna, we've been in the same tutor group since year seven, and it's been a laugh a minute since then. You're quiet, intelligent, funny, and geeky in so many ways, howvere, put a drink in your hand and you're away. BRILLIANT!
Lily, you're off-the-wall, original and hilarious. I always knew you'd go and do something for charity in a different country. Don't EVER change missus!
Catey, what can I say? You've been my confident since the beginning of year 12. For someone with such a big mouth and personality, you can always keep things secret and say the right thing when I need to hear it. I only hope we can have many camp nights out to come and you'll always be my Captain Hook.
Amber, well we've always got along. Buffy, at the tender age of thirteen, les mis, Oh it's been fun. You're always there to liven things up at a party AND you're a big dirrrty scenester!
Grahame, my comrade-in-arms. My fellow Ginger. From that first Music class you've been at my side no matter what I've been going through. It goes to show that the Sand-Dancers really are a jolly folk. You deserve to be in Cambridge, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
John, during the original break-up I have to say I was surprised. You were a fantastic hep, with your Happy CD and meeting up with me for coffee and stuff. I always thought that you were such a reserved person but that's not always the case now, is it?
Patrick, aren't women great?! ha! You're funny, and I'm so grateful you stepped in to do Teechers, it was a fantastic play and that part was written for you. You're funny, you're stylish and 'i think we're aloooone nowwwwww'.
There's one last person I would like to thank (I hope I haven't forgotten anyone) and that's my Libby. The night I split up with him you were there drying my tears, holding me tight. I could never have forseen what came next. You've been my driving force the past two years, and although we haven't always seen eye-to-eye, I know that everything happens for a reason. We know that even if we hadn't became what we are now, then, that it would have happened eventually. Let's hope that the future is as bright as the present.
Two years is a long time, and lots of things have changed and people have moved on, but it will never alter the fact that I loveyou all with a passion that will never die.
how soppy am I?
loves and kisses and best wishes for Christmas, until I see you.
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"Art Saves, Make the pain a weapon you can use." ~Otep
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when a friend of mine was eating all natrual fruit lollies (dinosour ones) her found out why dinousours are extincted......they taste like cherry's!!!!! so damn good!!!!
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